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Turkey Day

Posted by #3 Ben at 11-26-1998 12:00 AM

Dead Turkeys Everywhere

It's been a while since I've done newz, so what the hell. Today's Turkey Day, the day we celebrate.. uh.. something important I'm sure. But we eat shitloads of turkey, so it's all good. However, we do have to tolerate our families for a while, and no one likes that. I'm sure we'll be hearing about casualties from Cary's family gathering on the 11 o'clock news.
But Turkey Day is about more than just eating shitloads of food. It's about caring and respecting, and- no wait, no it isn't. It's about stuffing your fat ass with turkey. (Note that this is only an American holiday. Of course this has nothing to do with the fact that most Americans are fat lazy slobs...)
Also, from the idiots who brought you the ghetto wall, comes the ghetto newz. Because here at CultNewz, we're idiots.

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